The author, who is known to me, who would like to remain anonymous for reasons that should be obvious.  The author attended the Newton Public Schools for 13 years and has worked in Newton’s restaurants, Newton’s public libraries, and currently the Newton Public Schools.

During my most recent Zoom meeting with one of my students, I asked how he was feeling about the current protests—his father is a Newton police officer, and I wanted to make sure my student was feeling okay. I can only imagine the pain a 14-year-old must feel as they see post after post saying their father’s workplace should be defunded. A few days prior to that conversation, I received an email from David Fleishman, who as of 2017 was paid approximately $300,000 dollars a year, saying that my roughly $22,000/year salary was too much for the city and my contract would possibly not be renewed.

Toni Morrison once wrote, “You are not the work you do; you are the person you are.” I spent my entire childhood in Newton and have only positive relationships with the police officers I have met outside of their work. My brother is good friends with a Newton police officer and he has been to my parent’s house many times—he is kind, committed to justice, and welcoming to others. He even texted my brother “Black Lives Matter” a few days ago.

The first time I remember interacting with the police in a professional capacity, I was a junior in high school hanging out with a few friends at night in Newton Center. It was probably around nine or ten P.M. I was a nerd in high school, so we weren’t drunk, and I was probably driving that night anyway. The carnival was set up on the green, so we went over to see what it looked like at night. A police officer appeared and yelled at us—and I mean really yelled at us, like someone yells at a sports match, not in the way that my students use the word yell to mean “a teacher used any tone of voice to tell me to stop doing something.” He told us to get the hell off the green, so we ran away, and I mean really ran. I was 16 years old, a closeted gay teen, had never had a drop of alcohol in my life, and I was terrified.

Reader, are you a white, home-owning adult over the age of 35 living in Newton, Massachusetts? Think back to all the times you remember interacting with any police officer in person for any reason at any point in your life. Maybe it was a time you got a speeding ticket. Did the officer’s presence make you feel safer? Or did you feel nervous as the officer approached? Did you feel like the rule you had broked was integral to the function of our society? Did you harbor any ill will towards that officer at any time before, during or after your interaction? Did you feel any frustration or powerlessness?

None of these police officers are bad people. Even Jeronimo Yanez, the cop who killed Philando Castile, was not a bad person according to his best friend in high school. But as I face the potential loss of my job, as my students face yet another round of losing the familiar adults in their life who support them, as the Newton Parks budget faces $424,000 in cuts, as the Newton Free Library (a place that practically raised me, and one of the only places in the entire city where anyone can sit down in an indoor place without having to spend any money) faces over $158,000 in cuts and the loss of its Sunday hours, while at the same time the Police department budget is increasing by $147,000 and Mayor Fuller kneels alongside our Chief of Police, I can’t help but wonder, who is my city changing for? Are the working people of Newton, those of us who have to work multiple jobs just to get by, those of us worried about the rising costs of our healthcare, those of us who are trying to balance expensive childcare with rent and mortgages, are we better served by an increase in policing? Or are we better served by robust public libraries, fully staffed public schools, and well-maintained public parks? And why do our elected officials seem to prefer the former?

Newton is a great city and community that I am proud to call my home, but we are only as great as our least well off member. Newton’s residents should email and call the Mayor and City Council members to demand the increased police budget be instead put towards our parks, schools, and libraries. This city is ours. It’s time we demand better.