I just heard from old friend and Village14 contributor Terry Malloy. We were rue’ing the current state of the world, particularly how it has cramped person-to-person socializing. Inspired by the beautiful weather over the weekend, we would like to offer a modest proposal.
We call upon the City of Newton to suspend all public drinking ordinances for the duration of the emergency. Our existing public facilities are nearly perfectly engineered to support a renaissance of public drinking. All over the city we have 6 foot long public benches already installed in parks. One could almost think the city foresaw this pandemic coming. These benches are epidemically perfect for pairs of people to safely sit on opposite ends, have a refreshing cold one, and catch up on the day’s news and the easiest place to score some toilet paper.
As for Terry and me, once enacted, our plan is beach chairs on Echo Bridge. You’re welcome to join us but …. push back a bit there buddy