I’ve been thinking carefully about how to respond to gender discussions around Donald Trump, Harvey Weinstein, George H.W. Bush, and now closer to home, things that have been posted on Village14 and the explosive Boston Globe column about sexual harassment and sexual assault at the Massachusetts State House, where I work. The news articles have made this a popular topic of conversation nationally and locally but the reaction that has been weighing on me more than anything is that of the women in my life. While men discuss this incredulously, women say its par for the course given the indignities, large and small, they suffer through all the time, every week, every day of their lives.
I’ve listened when the women in my life said they needed men to speak out. It took me a while to find the right words, but here’s my best try.
Every action that subtly demeans a woman’s worth feeds into the culture that looks the other way when women are sexually harassed or assaulted.
Every time someone says an offhand comment is “not a big deal” or that women are taking a comment “out of context”, that feeds into the culture that makes women scared to come forward.
Men, I’m talking to you now. We have to do a better job at understanding and internalizing the little ways in which society allows us to use our privilege to our advantage. We have to actively seek to empower the women around us, rather than passively allow the culture to continue.
I’m hoping people will feel comfortable to share their reactions and experiences below. I’m especially hopeful that men will share their feelings about this, will pledge to do better, will pledge to have conversations with their buddies even in situations where it might make them uncomfortable.
It’s time for us to change the conversation around gender, and there’s no better time to start than now.
I am going to share my own observation. I drew up a sample that includes the most recent 14 threads, not because this is V14, but that is how many threads have gone up since Greg first posted about Scott’s ad. Nine of those threads were initiated by moderators with the names of Bryan, Greg, Sean, Bruce, Jeffrey and Keith. Four were by “Village14,” which I assume to be Greg or Sean. And there is one with the name, Sallee.
So, let’s toss VF as a moderator for now, and what you have is nine male-controlled threads, and one by a woman. As we know, a key indicator of discrimination is outcomes. For this sample, 90% of the threads are initiated by men. If we include the VF threads as male initiated, that would mean there would be 13:1 male/female ratio, or 93% of threads controlled by men.
Sorry for the interruption. Please go on with what you were saying.
@Bill: Not an interruption, you’re absolutely 100% right. The same thing occurred to me as I was writing this thread, and have already talked to Greg about including more women as moderators. We definitely need more women regulars here.
The good news is that one of the reasons this is the case is because several of V14’s female contributors are currently busy running for office, including Andreae Downs, Gail Spector, and Julia Malakie.
I appreciate you discussing this but I also appreciate Bill’s points. In addition to women bloggers, I’d love to see some more racial diversity in the bloggers here. That’s not to say that I don’t appreciate your efforts in regards to things like BLM, Bryan. But we could benefit from more voices.
Bryan: Great response!
Great thread! Teach your children well, because gender bias starts at a young age…
I’ve always felt it’s a big mistake to have separate organized sports for boys and girls. I say that as someone who coached youth sports for more than 20 years. Girls get the silent message behind segregation of the sexes, and it’s the exact wrong message to be sending them. It’s a clear message that they can’t compete with boys. Boys unfortunately get the same message, except they interpret it slightly differently than girls. Boys assume they are physically superior to girls, and it’s a mindset they carry into adulthood…
Newton should be leading the way to erase gender discrimination in youth sports. [It’s a wide-spread societal issue, but some progressive community has got to go first]. School sports should emphasize teamwork, and that means BOTH genders working together…
I realize most people are not ready for a radical change in youth sports. But if I can get people to think about this even for five minutes, it was worth my time to post these thoughts.
Bryan: well said
Bill,
Great observation. We at v14 (we prefer that to VF) need to broaden the voices represented.
Please do be aware that posting on V14 is mostly by people who ask to join the blog. We don’t really exclude. That said, the onus is now on us to recruit writers from a broader spectrum. And, we need to see if there are any structural issues at work that discourage women, people of color, LGBTQ folks, &c. from participating, either posting or commenting.
I am a female contributor to V14, along with others. I was asked to join V14 after I had been commenting on the blog for a while. Contributors post whenever and whatever they choose. I can’t imagine any structural issues affecting who posts or comments.
Age is another consideration. At 80, I’m almost certain I’m, the oldest poster and blogger on this site. 80 has pluses and minuses. You can say whatever you think, but you get the sneaking suspicion that some folks aren’t listening to you anymore. I’m absolutely no fan of Donald Trump, but I do sympathize when pundits suggest he can’t change simply because he’s past his 70th birthday. Of course, these are folks who will up the age to 80 when they cross 70. They have been upping the age since they argued back in the 60’s you couldn’t trust anyone over 30. I think I’ve learned a lot from just about everyone who publishes here regularly including Marti. I once had some cross words with her that I now regret.
Are there any V14 bloggers who are either single parents or disabled?
Meredith, yes, I believe that there are bloggers who are single parents or disabled. The question about gender here relates to Moderators, those contributors who are allowed to upload a story or a thread. When I want to get a topic covered, I ask Greg Reibman to put it up. Generally, he has put up 90% of my submitted topics. I think that one angle of this thread is to raise awareness that it would be more gender and diversity friendly to add more women Moderators and more Moderators of color and more Moderators from different cultural backgrounds. I would love to be a Moderator. I would like to see a job description of the Moderator, and how one applies to be one. If Moderators are selected by current Moderators, then the selection process may not include a diverse set of candidates.
It’s great to see so much interest in contributing to this site. This is an all volunteer site and moderating and maintaining takes time, passion, commitment and ideas.
As Bryan noted, two of our best long-time active contributors Gail Spector and Julia Malakie as well as Andreae Downs, a less frequent contributor, had to step aside as they ran for office. We’ve also always welcomed guest threads and those have often lead to invites to become regulars as well. Alas not everyone has the time or inclination beyond their one topic of interest (We prefer folks not be a one issue contributor). I’ve recently invited two of our retiring city councilors who have been very active on Village 14 over the years — Amy Sangiolo and Ted Hess-Mahan — to join in January. Please encourage them to say yes!
I’m all in favor of a bigger tent Village 14. I know the other moderators here are too because we talk about it all the time. Traditionally the only rules have been (a) threads need to be about Newton (b) bloggers must use their real name and (c) no elected officials (although we do not exclude area councilors). Looking forward to adding new voices after election day.
Here’s what I found, an outdated “about us” list of Village 14 Moderators – https://village14.com/about-village14/
Of 19 bios, 13 are men, 6 are women. Greer Tan Swiston, who I haven’t seen posting in a couple of years, is the only Asian American Moderator. A woman named Kara Robbins is also a moderator who either left Newton, or hasn’t posted in a couple of years. If that’s right, there are 17 current Moderators, 13 men, 4 women. Looks like there are some job openings………. I can bring the special education perspective to the blog, with over 20 years of personal and professional expertise. Where does one apply?
The other thing I should have added, I’ve found that our best bloggers here are folks who also comment here. Jo-Louise you fit that description and you’d be a great addition to Village 14. Not only do we need folks who can bring passion to a discussion about Spec Ed, we also need someone to volunteer to clean up our outdated About Us page. Looking forward to reading what you have to say.
Per the “analysis,” I was making a tongue-in-cheek observation that even V14 could be accused of being sexist if you spun the information that way. (cough, cough). Hence, the number 14.
However, I applaud any effort that you make to increase your diversity and to be more reflective of the Newton community.
That said, in the midst of the political crazy season in Newton, I will take a moment to thank Greg, Sean & Co. for developing and maintaining V14, and making it possible for us to have these lively and educational discussions. I know that we knock heads on some issues, but it does not subtract for my appreciation of what you guys (again, with the guys!) have done. Please keep on keepin’ on.
“….(c) no elected officials (although we do not exclude area councilors). …”
Or Elected Charter Commissioners?
Yes or elected charter commissioners, who technically may be former commissioners. Didn’t the commission disband after issuing its final report?
@Greg / Jack: Technically we serve until 30 days after November 7th, although Greg is correct that at this point we have no official function that I’m aware of.
“A charter commission shall continue to exist until thirty days after the election at which its charter adoption or revisions proposal, if any, is required to be submitted to the voters under this chapter or until thirty days after submission to the city council or town meeting of a final report recommending no new charter or revision.” https://malegislature.gov/Laws/GeneralLaws/PartI/TitleVII/Chapter43B/Section7
Greg – I have a well-written column that I’d like to submit as in the guest column. How is that done? Do I have to find an official V14 member to post it or is there another means to get it up?
As with all Village 14 communications the best way to connect is though the “contact” function at the top of each page.
@Jo-Louise – I meant moderators. I was not referring to people like myself who comment, just those who post columns.
@Greg @Jack
Bryan Barash has posted consistently for the past 18 months while acting as a Charter Commission member. He’s posted on the topic of his position– the charter– multiple times as well.
How is that not a blatant continued violation of your own V14 rules? How did that happen? How do we ensure it doesn’t happen again?
PS Why are my posts censored?
Important topic. Unintentionally humorous title.