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TabloidOne of the unique features of the annual Tour de Newton is that all the bike riders stop in each village and hear a bit about the village from the Village Greeters while grabbing snacks and their village badge.

In the first year Tour de Newton we were caught short handed and I had to step in as the Thompsonville Greeter – the hardest job of the tour.  What can be said about Thompsonville?  Nobody seems to know much about it or how it ever became an official village of Newton, or even where exactly it is.   As the local T’ville riders gathered, before the start of the ride,  I begged them to tell me something I could pass on to the visitors that would be arriving all day.  One local said “well there was that murder in Thompsonville a few years ago” PAY DIRT!   It was a perfect true-life, horrific, tabloid story featuring a cheating wife, a jealous husband, a hired hit man, and a murder in broad daylight in Thompsonville – the Tour de Newton loved it.

The 2nd year Tour de Newton, a 2nd miracle, I came across a 2nd true-life Thompsonville tabloid story.  80 something year old Sonia Paine was working in her antique store on Route 9.  A lowlife thug came in and attempted to hold her up.  The senior Sonia reached under the counter, pulled out a baseball bat, beat him senseless, and held him there till the police arrived.  It turned out the thief was wanted up and down the East Coast for a whole series of nasty crimes.  He was a one man mobile crime wave stopped dead in his tracks by Thompsonville’s fearless Sonia Paine and her mighty baseball bat.

So the third annual Tour de Newton is coming up on Sunday June 21 and I do believe in miracles.  So if anyone has yet another, third T’ville tabloid story we can keep this proud Tour de Newton tradition alive for one more year.   Send your juiciest stories about otherwise sleepy Thompsonville to [email protected]

… and meanwhile go sign up to ride this year’s Tour de Newton or sign up to become a village greeter for your village – send email to [email protected]