Lincoln Eliot Elementary School told reporters this afternoon that they could not help but feel deeply depressed after catching sight of local voters filing out of their school’s gymnasium, the Onion reports today.
The Onion: Lincoln Eliot pupils feel ‘really bad’ for ‘sad’ Newton voters
by Greg Reibman | Nov 4, 2014 | Stuff that is not yet true | 8 comments
If you search The Onion’s archives, you’ll find a number of stories over the years that have Newton, MA, as the (alleged) dateline. Makes me wonder if a staffer or two might have come from or spent time in the Garden City.
What a hoot!!!
Too funny that we’ve got a Newton dateline in the Onion
Dang! Scooped again!
@Jim: As I always used to tell my reporters: “Don’t get mad, get even.”
In other words make up some really preposterous national news story before they do.
Here’s a couple of classic Onion pieces with Newton datelines.
Hey wait a minute, that’s my job.
Jim, this one’s free. Here is secretly recorded video of a very famous person revealing how he voted on the ballot questions today.